Good Morning, Good Night

I wrote this piece in one sitting. It took me about 10 minutes. It is about the most amazing night of my life. That night I got to share a bed (not sexually) with A-S. We stayed up for a long time and shared a series of beautiful moments that are permanently burned in my mind. Her eyes are always there. This story was then spun off into part of Sprung and Insert Romance Here. I love this story.

Good Morning, Good Night

The night grew cold outside, but the bodies grew warm. Only whispers could be heard as the copious amounts of intoxication ran ramped through their bodies. One, clearly attached, struggled internally, but showed no signs of boundaries, while the other chatted quietly, “May I?” The answer, always the same, kept the feelings moving. He could only want more. He didn’t dare say more. More was thought, more was expressed. Tired eyes closed and tired bodies limped.

The one thought left in his mind was the thought that would hold on for life, the look of her beautiful eyes glimmering in the pale candle light. These eyes, unlike any other, glistened and danced the entire night. Seemingly, they sparkled only for him. In the back of his pensive mind, he knew that they would indeed sparkle for others, but this, this flicker of beauty, was his. No other flash of light could compare. Not a super nova, not a star. Not the sun, not the moon. Bodies were pressed tight, although still warm from clothes. It could not get any warmer, and yet, the two grasped tighter. He could not believe this was happening to him. The girl only dreamed, share the same air.

Her heart beat only for him, and his for her. They beat in syncopation. Thump, Thu-thump. The pounding of the one collective heart beat drove him to his own world. This world was no more once all was raised and the sun poked its head above the plain.
Good morning, good night.

Shapeshifter

Last year, I found a small snippet, a chorus, if you will, and just the note "put her name in it" in my Word documents. This piece had not been modified since 2003. I can only imagine who this is about...a past band member? Yes. So, when I found this, I re-wrote the chorus and wrote some verses. (Can you find her name in the words?)

I had never really liked this piece. It has always seemed very rushed to me. Both parts, the newest and the latest. Alas, I have been infatuated with the concept of desiring to change yourself so much, that you are able to shift your physical self. The sheer willpower of man is strong and beautiful thing.

Shapeshifter

She’s a shape shifter.
She’ll show you her heart.
She’s a shape shifter.
She’ll show you your heart.

Beating you down with all she knows
She is only folklore
A figment of my blank stares

It’s just like choking
Gone in a cloud of smoke
Decapitate me and let me see your deceit

She’s a shape shifter.
She’ll show you her heart.
She’s a shape shifter.
She’ll show you your heart.

Insert Romance Here

The last piece's underlying theme is this piece's central focus. A-S is a perfect subject for a love/love-lost song. She has the three B's of a great song...brains, beauty, and **sigh** a boyfriend. I have always thought that there was some unspoken connection between the two of us...and who knows, there may have been. The one-line refrain is the exact sentence I said to her the moment I saw her after a long hiatus, the last meeting before I wrote this song. "Wow, I had forgotten how beautiful you are." It was roughly a year after I wrote Sprung (so around Fall of '05). The roadblocks, walls, and permission in this song refer to the boyfriend aspect of this tragic story and the final verse was my fleeting chance to be let into her heart. I hope my lovelorn poetry entertains you. (Half-sarcasm)

Insert Romance Here

The roadblocks count against us
The slurring counts for us.
Why can’t they tear this shit down?
Why can’t we stay bound?

Wow, I had forgotten how beautiful you are.

These walls are on fire with your cold
These feet freeze with your warmth
“May I?” I’m forced to ask.
But the answer is always the same

Wow, I had forgotten how beautiful you are.

This fateful day in summer,
This one chance to be what I’m not.
Here’s the hook:

Wow, I had forgotten how beautiful you are.

Sprung

This song was also written in the Summer of 2004. It was after me and the boys had graduated (except for the ones that hadn't graduated yet or had already graduated, Greg and Mark, respectively). I wanted to write a poem that encapsulated how I felt about the most amazing Summer of my life. So I named the song "Sprung," you know, past tense of Spring...clever right? There are some very fun things I placed into this song.

The entirety of the verses were for my best friends, the Boys. We used to participate in all sorts of recreational drugs. And that summer was the first time, we had ever done mushrooms. So the lines about tripping and LSD (which we had not done yet) were about that. The final verse has 'easter eggs' hidden in it. It has references to the original members of the RBT and I believe they are in order in which they were bought...Doc, Scarface, Mr. Bill, Thumper, Lone Ranger, and Dino. Can you find them?

And finally, they most important thing about this song was the only unaltered line of the chorus. "Your heart burns a whole through my chest." The thing about this song is that it is an homage to that summer, and during that summer, everything I did had an underlying crush on one girl...I will call her A-S. So this song/poem does just that, accents my friends, but eludes to A-S. Actually, there are a couple more songs and things I wrote about her. One piece I wrote was a love note to her (it will be posted later). Well, that is enough rambling.

Sprung

The grass sticks to your back.
Hand to hand combat.
Stumble through weeks, through months
I’d take this trip again.

Your heart burns a whole through my chest.
Is this what LSD is?

The stench of past ruined your house.
Running, but taking.
We all touched solitary, but never were.
I’d give it to you in a double heartbeat.

Your heart burns a whole through my chest.
You have more music?

No doctor needed, these scars will heal tomorrow.
Oh no, these ears won’t ever hear your laughter.
Loneliness? Is that a question?
Memory grows ever near to extinction.

Your heart burns a whole through my chest.
Who thought I’d remember it?

The Last Reason I Had to Spend Time

This song was written in the Summer 2004. When Scott and I went with my family to Crystal Lake, Michigan, we used to sit on two separate, parallel docks only 50 feet from each other. After 'power-smoking' we would sit on our respective docks and listen to music or do whatever. It was a nice private stoned time. Anyways, I was listening to a lot of Radiohead and a little bit of Spitalfield. The way I started writing this song is: what does water think of humans? Do they enjoy our company or is it a more cynical approach? Well, I chose cynical.

I always thought the feel of this song would be (if music were set to it) soaring vocals and a slower more melodic guitar part. Maybe even just vocals and guitar. Well, here it is:

The Last Reason I Had to Spend Time

Call Me a murderer?
Steal my children, I dare you.
I see the evil sparkle at the back of your eye.

Extensions of greetings,
Shake my hand, I dare you.
Spit on me, thrash me, and take me away.

Funny "haha," how it all turns away, huh?
The power grabs your one being.

You crave arsenic in your heart
as I long for feet in my head.

You think it's all cut and dry?
Or is your soul dry?
I know the rest of you isn't.

Try it. Try it. Try it.
You're just like me.
You're just like me.

Irresistibly Worship Forever

This is the last of the HRUNC-era scribblings (unless I find some things or get them from RJ). I was listening to more of the later AFI and even some Eve 6. They were always into homonyms and reuse words in a different context. That is where the 'concentration' line comes from. I don't really like this song. It feels like I had time, a small idea for words, and Eve 6. Not so happy with it. Well, here it is:

Irresistibly Worship Forever

Your look allied darkness
You looked through my being, only
Finding the deepness, until
You revealed it, exposing

I’m hoping your voice burns through my ears
I wouldn’t have to feel your deceit
Too bad, your concentration wasn’t concentrated

The vernacular shows nothing more
The mind behind the man implodes
Feelings are potent
And I, I am here

I’m hoping your voice burns through my ears
I wouldn’t have to feel your deceit
Too bad, your concentration wasn’t concentrated

Radiate breaks the darkness
Freeing me from the void

One Thousand Reasons

This song was written about the same time as the other two (circa 2002). It was about the same girl as "Anger and Acrimony." I guess, she was my first muse. This song is about trying to search myself for ONE good reason to do what I was doing. I was terrified at what could happen. And when I looked past the fear, I found one thousand of them. Originally, the number 1000 came from the conversation that sparked this song. As we were lying under the stars on a playground, she asked me, "how many stars do you think we can see?" To which I replied, "Exactly a thousand."

One Thousand Reasons

Glistening when nothing will
The hope that breaks through the mystery
What can happen? Only to diminish.
Accomplishments show naught.

The winding puzzle of the ever glory
Asphyxiate on the site.
Choke the air in awe.
Find an outlet, exploit it.

Still the light and impede the darkness
Sharpen your eyes with the impending sadness
One thousand reasons to lie down
One thousand reasons to let go

Anger and Acrimony

This song was written right around the same time as "In a Perfect World." It has the air of earlier AFI (as opposed to IAPW being from the more "Sing the Sorrow" era). The anger and verocity of the lyrics. I was drinking straight gin then because I thought I was cool and had real problems, but this song was mainly about the fact that to make a move on a girl, I had to get drunk with her first. Psh, High School, what a crazy innocent time?!

One of my favorite lines in this song was "This war is waged over useless land." I couldn't win her heart and frankly, I didn't know if I wanted it or if it was all just 'useless'. Enjoy.

Anger and Acrimony

Consuming as my belligerent self takes over.
Assumptions of placidness
Militancy runs through these porrous veins
Quarrelsome, I reach for the burning desire
Out.

Aggressivly, I’m shut down.
Burst to life as to your surprised, blind self
This war is waged over useless land.
Land that will never be walked on again
Dead.

We are the calmless one.
Come and be shown the heavenly purgatory
We are the calmless one.
Ride down the rage to us.

They hear the tranquil building, as we are swept away.
Forming to a new molding, a new type of day.

In a Perfect World

This was one of the first lyric sets I ever wrote and I wrote this song when I got back from a church work trip in the summer, oddly enough. I was listening to mainly AFI then. They talked a lot about the thought of 'disassociation' or being freed from yourself. I was big into the synonyms and based this sing almost solely on imagery.

It was about a dream I had. The dream was just a beautiful landscape of just a sunset over a field. It was just a flash in my mind, but I remembered the scene when I awoke the next day. And I thought about the visual battle light to dark (and vice versa) with each other. The whole title was originally, "Passed Out in a Perfect World," but I figured the 'Passed Out' wasn't necessary to the image I was trying to put out by the words.

In a Perfect World

Standing
Tulips of the marked
Fighting
Light to Dark
Sweeping
The line draws the battle field
It swallows me whole as it ends

The scene gets thinner through the eyes of night
Disassociate the feeling of consciousness
Joyous memories swirl
And the time has come

Swimming
Fields of gray
Changing
Salutations to the day
Signing
To the perfect way of closing
What once was, now decays to falling

The scene gets thinner through the eyes of night
Disassociate the feeling of consciousness
Joyous memories swirl
And the time has come

Dispel the dew
Beseech the good
Enthrall the open-minded
Sing the new
Vacate the old
Poison the pure
Purify the unclean
Show me life

The scene gets thinner through the eyes of night
Disassociate the feeling of consciousness
Joyous memories swirl